Three-Character Classic - 三字經

The Three-Character Classic [三字經 Sanzi Jing] is a 700 year old classic which Chinese kids have been required to memorize even before they could read and write. It is a very compact "poem" that summarizes all of the basic tenets of Confucianism, serving a very similar function that a catechism has in a Catholic school. Confucianists, despite their tremendous influence on Chinese thought for over 2,000 years, have a reputation as being serious folks without the zest for life that Taoists have. But maybe that impression is incorrect. Maybe the text has been misinterpreted for 2,000 years. Here is a new, improved translation which traditionalists would not approve but it is arguably valid.


Chinese original

人之初
性本善
性相近
習相遠

苟不教
性乃遷
教之道
貴以專

昔孟母
擇鄰處
子不學
斷機杼

竇燕山
有義方
教五子
名俱揚

養不教
父之過
教不嚴
師之惰

子不學
非所宜
幼不學
老何為

玉不琢
不成器
人不學
不知義


Traditional Translation

People at birth,
are naturally good.
Their natures are similar;
their habits become different.

If, negligently, not taught,
their nature deteriorate.
The right way to teach,
is with absolute concentration.

Formerly, the mother of Mencius
chose a neighborhood.
When her child would not learn,
she broke the shuttle from the loom.

Dou Yanshan,
had the right method.
He taught five sons,
each of whom raised the family reputation.

To feed without teaching,
is the father's fault.
To teach without severity,
is the teacher's laziness.

If the child does not study,
it is improper.
If he does not study while young,
how will he act when old?

Jade that has not been polished
cannot be used.
Person that has not studied
cannot know righteousness.


New, Improved Translation

At the beginning of life.
sex is good.
Basically, all the sex are the same.
but it depends on the way you do it.

If you do not practice all the time.
sex will leave you.
The way of learning it
is very important to make love with only one person.

Once a great mother, Mrs Meng
chose her neighbor to avoid bad sex influence.
If you don't study hard,
your dick will become useless.

Dou, the Famous
owned a very effective and exciting medicine
All his five son took it
and their sexual abilities were well-known.

If your children don't know how to do it,
it is all your fault.
If they had lots of problems with it,
their teacher must be too lazy to tell them details of sex.

You may refuse to study this
but that is a real mistake
If you don't learn it in childhood,
you will lose your ability when old

If you don't exercise your dick,
it won't become hard and strong.
If you don't learn sex,
you cannot enjoy its sweetness.