The Cause Of Death

One lovely morning, Ben and Thomas were out golfing.
Ben slices his ball deep into a wooded ravine.

He grabs his 8-iron and proceeds down the embankment into the
ravine in search of his ball.

Ben searches diligently through the thick underbrush and suddenly he spots something shiny.

As he gets closer, he realizes that the shiny object is in fact an 8-iron in the hands of a skeleton lying near an old golf ball.

Ben excitedly calls out to his golfing partner: "Hey Thomas, come here, I got big trouble down here."

Thomas comes running over to the edge of the ravine and calls out: "What's the matter Ben?"

Ben shouts back in a nervous voice:

"Throw me my 7-iron!

Looks like you can't get out of here with an 8-iron."

The Skeleton In The Closet

A very large, old, building was being torn down in Chicago to make room for a new skyscraper.

Due to its proximity to other buildings it could not be imploded and had to be dismantled floor by floor.

While working on the 49th floor, two construction workers found a skeleton in a small closet behind the elevator shaft.

They decided that they should call the police.

When the police arrived they directed them to the closet and showed them the skeleton fully clothed and standing upright.

They said, "This could be Jimmy Hoffa or somebody really important."

Two days went by and the construction workers couldn't stand it any more; they had to know who they had found.

They called the police and said, "We are the two guys who found the skeleton in the closet and we want to know if it was Jimmy Hoffa or somebody important."

The police said, "It's not Jimmy Hoffa, but it was somebody kind of important."

"Well, who was it?"

"The 1956 Blonde National Hide-and-Seek Champion."