Ah Beng Jokes: AM and PM

A man asked Ah Beng why Najib goes walking in the Evening and not in the morning Ah Beng replied Najib is PM not AM

The Scotsman's Kilt

A young lady asked the Scotsman what he wore under his kilt.

"Reach up there and find out."

She did, but quickly pulled her hand back out and said, "Oh, it's gruesome!"

"Aye, it has," replied the Scotsman, "and if you put your hand back up there, it'll grow some more.

Ah Beng Jokes: Water the Plants

Ah Beng told his servant: "Go and water the plants!"
Servant: "It's already raining."
Ah Beng : "So what? Take an umbrella and go."

Ah Beng Jokes: Future Tense

Teacher: "I killed a person" convert this sentence into future tense.

Ah Beng : The future tense is "u will go to jail"

To All My Female Friends & Their Men

A man was brought before the judge and charged with Necrophilia (making love to a dead woman).

The judge told him, 'In 20 years on the bench, I've never heard such a disgusting, immoral thing.'

Just give me one good reason why I shouldn't lock you up and throw away the key!'

The man replied, 'I'll give you THREE good reasons:

1. It's none of your damn business.

2. She was my wife; and.....

3. I didn't KNOW she was dead, she ALWAYS acted that way!'

So ladies try to move a little during the game even if you're just faking it... as we all do... lol ha ha ha ... now we're busted...

Ah Beng Jokes: Only the Winner

Ah Beng : Why are all these people running?
Man - This is a race, the winner will get the cup
Ah Beng - If only the winner will get the cup, why others running?

Ah Beng Jokes: Weather Forecast

Once Ah Beng was walking he had a glove on one hand and not on other.

So the man asked him why he did so. He replied that the weather forecast announced that on one hand it would be cold and on the other hand it would be hot.

Ah Beng Jokes: How do you know?

Ah Beng in a bar and his cellular phone rings. He picks it up and Says "Hello, how did you know I was here?"

Ah Beng Jokes: School

How do you recognize Ah Beng in School?

He is the one who erases the notes from the book when the teacher erases the board.

Ah Beng Jokes: Parking Fine

Ah Beng comes back 2 his car & find a note saying "Parking Fine"
He Writes a note and sticks it to a pole "Thanks for compliment."