Mar 10, 2012
Singapore Cadet - Privilege and Money
Private Lim fails basic training and reports to the commander for punishment.
The officer says: “Chose your own forfeit. One month’s loss of privileges or 20 days’ pay.”
The Singapore cadet thinks about it. “I guess I’ll take the money.”
Mar 7, 2012
That's how the fight started - Phone a Friend
My wife and I were watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed.
I turned to her and said, 'Do you want to have sex?'
'No,' she answered. I then said,
'Is that your final answer?'
She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying, 'Yes.'
So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."
And that's when the fight started...
I turned to her and said, 'Do you want to have sex?'
'No,' she answered. I then said,
'Is that your final answer?'
She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying, 'Yes.'
So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."
And that's when the fight started...
Feb 28, 2012
That's how the fight started - Christmas Gift
One year, I decided to buy my mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift.
The next year, I didn't buy her a gift.
When she asked me why, I replied,
"Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!"
And that's how the fight started.....
The next year, I didn't buy her a gift.
When she asked me why, I replied,
"Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!"
And that's how the fight started.....
Feb 20, 2012
Funny Jokes - Ocean View
A group of 15-year old guys discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they should meet at the Dairy Queen next to the Ocean View restaurant because they only had $6.00 between them and Jannie Johnson, that cute girl in Social Studies, lives on that street and they might see her and they can ride their bikes there.
Ten years later, the group of 25-year-old guys discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the beer was cheap, they had free snacks, the band was good, there was no cover and there were lots of cute girls.
Ten years later, at 35 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the booze was good, it was right near the gym and if they went late enough, there wouldn't be too many whiny little kids.
Ten years later, at 45 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the martinis were big, and the waitresses had nice boobs and wore tight pants.
Ten years later, at 55 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the prices were reasonable, the wine list was good and fish is good for your cholesterol.
Ten years later, at 65 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the lighting was good and they have an early bird special.
Ten years later, at 75 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the food was not too spicy, and the restaurant was handicapped accessible.
Ten years later, at 85 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because they had never been there before.
Ten years later, the group of 25-year-old guys discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the beer was cheap, they had free snacks, the band was good, there was no cover and there were lots of cute girls.
Ten years later, at 35 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the booze was good, it was right near the gym and if they went late enough, there wouldn't be too many whiny little kids.
Ten years later, at 45 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the martinis were big, and the waitresses had nice boobs and wore tight pants.
Ten years later, at 55 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the prices were reasonable, the wine list was good and fish is good for your cholesterol.
Ten years later, at 65 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the lighting was good and they have an early bird special.
Ten years later, at 75 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the food was not too spicy, and the restaurant was handicapped accessible.
Ten years later, at 85 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because they had never been there before.
Feb 10, 2012
2011 Darwin Awards
That last one has to be a "Land" speed record for a Chevy Impala!
It's that time again. The 2011 DARWIN Awards are out. The annual honor is given to the persons who did the gene pool the biggest service by killing themselves in the most extraordinarily stupid way.
Last year's winner was the fellow who was killed by a Coke machine which toppled over on top of him as he was attempting to tip a free soda out. This year's winner was a real rocket scientist... HONESTLY! Read on...And remember that each and every one of these is a TRUE STORY!!!
And the nominees were:
Semifinalist #1
A young Canadian man, searching for a way of getting drunk cheaply, because he had no money with which to buy alcohol, mixed gasoline with milk. Not surprisingly, this concoction made him ill, and he vomited into the fireplace in his house. This resulting explosion and fire burned his house down, killing both him and his sister.
Semifinalist #2
Three Brazilian men were flying in a light aircraft at low altitude when another plane approached. It appears that they decided to moon the occupants of the other plane, but lost control of their own aircraft and crashed. They were all found dead in the wreckage with their pants around their ankles
Semifinalist #3
A 22-year-old Reston , VA , man was found dead after he tried to use octopus straps to bungee jump off a 70-foot rail road trestle. Fairfax County police said Eric Barcia, a fast-food worker, taped a bunch of these straps together, wrapped an end around one foot, anchored the other end to the trestle at Lake Accotink Park, jumped and hit the pavement. Warren Carmichael, a police spokesman, said investigators think Barcia was alone because his car was found nearby. 'The length of the cord that he had assembled was greater than the distance between the trestle and the ground,' Carmichael said. Police say the apparent cause of death was 'Major trauma.'
Semifinalist #4
A man in Alabama died from rattlesnake bites. It seems that he and a friend were playing a game of catch, using the rattlesnake as a ball. The friend - no doubt a future Darwin Awards candidate - was hospitalized.
Semifinalist #5
Employees in a medium-sized warehouse in west Texas noticed the smell of a gas leak. Sensibly, management evacuated the building, extinguishing all potential sources of ignition; lights, power, etc.. After the building had been evacuated, two technicians from the gas company were dispatched. Upon entering the building, they found they had difficulty navigating in the dark. To their frustration, none of the lights worked. Witnesses later described the sight of one of the technicians reaching into his pocket and retrieving an object that resembled a cigarette lighter. Upon operation of the lighter-like object, the gas in the warehouse exploded, sending pieces of it up to three miles away. Nothing was found of the technicians, but the lighter was virtually untouched by the explosion. The technician suspected of causing the blast had never been thought of as ''bright'' by his peers.
And Now, for the winner of this year's Darwin Award -
(As always, awarded posthumously):
The Arizona Highway Patrol came upon a pile of smoldering metal embedded in the side of a cliff rising above the road at the apex of a curve. The wreckage resembled the site of an airplane crash, but it was a car. The type of car was unidentifiable at the scene. Police investigators finally pieced together the mystery. An amateur rocket scientist had somehow gotten hold of a JATO unit (Jet Assisted Take Off, actually a solid-fuel rocket) that is used to give heavy military transport planes an extra 'push' for taking off from short airfields. He had driven his Chevy Impala out into the desert and found a long, straight stretch of road. He attached the JATO unit to the car, jumped in, got up some speed and fired off the JATO!
The facts as best could be determined are that the operator of the 1967 Impala hit the JATO ignition at a distance of approximately 3.0 miles from the crash site. This was established by the scorched and melted asphalt at that location.
The JATO, if operating properly, would have reached maximum thrust within 5 seconds, causing the Chevy to reach speeds well in excess of 350 mph and continuing at full power for an additional 20 -25 seconds. The driver, and soon-to-be pilot, would have experienced G-forces usually reserved for dog fighting F-14 jocks under full afterburners, causing him to become irrelevant for the remainder of the event.
However, the automobile remained on the straight highway for about 2.5 miles (15-20 seconds) before the driver applied and completely melted the brakes, blowing the tires and leaving thick rubber marks on the road surface, then becoming airborne for an additional 1.4 miles and impacting the cliff face at a height of 125 feet, leaving a blackened crater 3 feet deep in the rock. Most of the driver's remains were not recoverable.
Epilogue: It has been calculated that this moron attained a ground speed of approximately 420-mph, though much of his voyage was not actually on the ground.
You just couldn't make this stuff up, could you?
It's that time again. The 2011 DARWIN Awards are out. The annual honor is given to the persons who did the gene pool the biggest service by killing themselves in the most extraordinarily stupid way.
Last year's winner was the fellow who was killed by a Coke machine which toppled over on top of him as he was attempting to tip a free soda out. This year's winner was a real rocket scientist... HONESTLY! Read on...And remember that each and every one of these is a TRUE STORY!!!
And the nominees were:
Semifinalist #1
A young Canadian man, searching for a way of getting drunk cheaply, because he had no money with which to buy alcohol, mixed gasoline with milk. Not surprisingly, this concoction made him ill, and he vomited into the fireplace in his house. This resulting explosion and fire burned his house down, killing both him and his sister.
Semifinalist #2
Three Brazilian men were flying in a light aircraft at low altitude when another plane approached. It appears that they decided to moon the occupants of the other plane, but lost control of their own aircraft and crashed. They were all found dead in the wreckage with their pants around their ankles
Semifinalist #3
A 22-year-old Reston , VA , man was found dead after he tried to use octopus straps to bungee jump off a 70-foot rail road trestle. Fairfax County police said Eric Barcia, a fast-food worker, taped a bunch of these straps together, wrapped an end around one foot, anchored the other end to the trestle at Lake Accotink Park, jumped and hit the pavement. Warren Carmichael, a police spokesman, said investigators think Barcia was alone because his car was found nearby. 'The length of the cord that he had assembled was greater than the distance between the trestle and the ground,' Carmichael said. Police say the apparent cause of death was 'Major trauma.'
Semifinalist #4
A man in Alabama died from rattlesnake bites. It seems that he and a friend were playing a game of catch, using the rattlesnake as a ball. The friend - no doubt a future Darwin Awards candidate - was hospitalized.
Semifinalist #5
Employees in a medium-sized warehouse in west Texas noticed the smell of a gas leak. Sensibly, management evacuated the building, extinguishing all potential sources of ignition; lights, power, etc.. After the building had been evacuated, two technicians from the gas company were dispatched. Upon entering the building, they found they had difficulty navigating in the dark. To their frustration, none of the lights worked. Witnesses later described the sight of one of the technicians reaching into his pocket and retrieving an object that resembled a cigarette lighter. Upon operation of the lighter-like object, the gas in the warehouse exploded, sending pieces of it up to three miles away. Nothing was found of the technicians, but the lighter was virtually untouched by the explosion. The technician suspected of causing the blast had never been thought of as ''bright'' by his peers.
And Now, for the winner of this year's Darwin Award -
(As always, awarded posthumously):
The Arizona Highway Patrol came upon a pile of smoldering metal embedded in the side of a cliff rising above the road at the apex of a curve. The wreckage resembled the site of an airplane crash, but it was a car. The type of car was unidentifiable at the scene. Police investigators finally pieced together the mystery. An amateur rocket scientist had somehow gotten hold of a JATO unit (Jet Assisted Take Off, actually a solid-fuel rocket) that is used to give heavy military transport planes an extra 'push' for taking off from short airfields. He had driven his Chevy Impala out into the desert and found a long, straight stretch of road. He attached the JATO unit to the car, jumped in, got up some speed and fired off the JATO!
The facts as best could be determined are that the operator of the 1967 Impala hit the JATO ignition at a distance of approximately 3.0 miles from the crash site. This was established by the scorched and melted asphalt at that location.
The JATO, if operating properly, would have reached maximum thrust within 5 seconds, causing the Chevy to reach speeds well in excess of 350 mph and continuing at full power for an additional 20 -25 seconds. The driver, and soon-to-be pilot, would have experienced G-forces usually reserved for dog fighting F-14 jocks under full afterburners, causing him to become irrelevant for the remainder of the event.
However, the automobile remained on the straight highway for about 2.5 miles (15-20 seconds) before the driver applied and completely melted the brakes, blowing the tires and leaving thick rubber marks on the road surface, then becoming airborne for an additional 1.4 miles and impacting the cliff face at a height of 125 feet, leaving a blackened crater 3 feet deep in the rock. Most of the driver's remains were not recoverable.
Epilogue: It has been calculated that this moron attained a ground speed of approximately 420-mph, though much of his voyage was not actually on the ground.
You just couldn't make this stuff up, could you?
Jan 30, 2012
Women and Home Depot
Charlie was installing a new door and found that one of the hinges was missing
He asked his wife Mary if she would go to Home Depot and pick up a hinge.
Mary agreed to go. While she was waiting for the manager to finish serving a customer, her eye caught a beautiful bathroom faucet.
When the manager was finished, Mary asked him, "How much is that faucet?"
The manager replied, "That's a gold plated faucet and the price is $500.00. Mary exclaimed, "My goodness, that’s an expensive faucet -- certainly out of my price range.." She then proceeded to describe the hinge that Charlie had sent her to buy. The manager said that he had them in stock and went into the storeroom to get one. From the storeroom the manager yelled.
"Ma'am, you wanna screw for the hinge?" Mary shouted back, "No, but I will for the faucet."
This is why you can't send a woman to Home Depot.
Jan 20, 2012
Army Jokes: Singapore Dessert Soldier
Two Singaporean soldiers are talking.
Tan: “Pass the tiramisu.”
Lim: “Cannot-la.”
Tan: “Why not?”
Lim: “Against army regulations to help another soldier to dessert.”
Jan 15, 2012
The Truth is 'Out There'
WOMEN -
Two female friends are catching up:
- So, how was your evening last night?
- A disaster! After getting home, my dear beloved hubby wolfed down in 4 minutes, the dinner that took me all afternoon to prepare, "granted" me 3 minutes of passionate love before rolling over and falling asleep 2 minutes later. And you?
- Oh, mine was incredible. My hubby was waiting for me to get back home from work. He took me out for a very romantic dinner. We then walked back home, under an amazing starry sky, along the canal, for a good two hours. Once home, he lit up all the candles we had and our foreplay lasted for an hour. We then made love for another hour and then we chatted until late. It was wonderful...
MEN -
Meanwhile, at the pub, the husbands are "networking"...:
- So, how was your evening last night?
- Great! When I came home, the food was ready. I ate, we shagged and I fell asleep.
You?
- A nightmare! I came home earlier to fix the kitchen shelf. When I switched on the power drill, the fuse went out. The whole house went into darkness.
Couldn't find the bloody fuse-box, so when my better half arrived, I took her out.
It was the only thing to do to avoid getting an earful... Dinner was so expensive that I couldn't afford the taxi back home, so we had to walk home. Once there, the house was still in the dark, obviously, so I had to light all these f..cking candles to avoid knocking everything down. I was so wound up that it took me an hour to get a hard on, and another one to come. In the end, I was so p.ssed off that it took me ages to fall asleep, while she kept yapping on and on about f..k knows what!
Two female friends are catching up:
- So, how was your evening last night?
- A disaster! After getting home, my dear beloved hubby wolfed down in 4 minutes, the dinner that took me all afternoon to prepare, "granted" me 3 minutes of passionate love before rolling over and falling asleep 2 minutes later. And you?
- Oh, mine was incredible. My hubby was waiting for me to get back home from work. He took me out for a very romantic dinner. We then walked back home, under an amazing starry sky, along the canal, for a good two hours. Once home, he lit up all the candles we had and our foreplay lasted for an hour. We then made love for another hour and then we chatted until late. It was wonderful...
MEN -
Meanwhile, at the pub, the husbands are "networking"...:
- So, how was your evening last night?
- Great! When I came home, the food was ready. I ate, we shagged and I fell asleep.
You?
- A nightmare! I came home earlier to fix the kitchen shelf. When I switched on the power drill, the fuse went out. The whole house went into darkness.
Couldn't find the bloody fuse-box, so when my better half arrived, I took her out.
It was the only thing to do to avoid getting an earful... Dinner was so expensive that I couldn't afford the taxi back home, so we had to walk home. Once there, the house was still in the dark, obviously, so I had to light all these f..cking candles to avoid knocking everything down. I was so wound up that it took me an hour to get a hard on, and another one to come. In the end, I was so p.ssed off that it took me ages to fall asleep, while she kept yapping on and on about f..k knows what!
Jan 10, 2012
A Trilogy of Funny Commercials that never made TV
Three (3) funny commercials you will probably never see on TV - Tidy up with Ikea
Comments:
poor kid ..im w8ing for the video where he finds out what he was holding when he was little
amraKAMC 3 hours ago
...
MrThomasCWest 1 day ago
The shoe-lace one is the best but that one with the kid is a bit disturbing :-|
yokhana 1 day ago
Theses are awesome commercials
PiefaceclownPrdctns 1 day ago
Christ, Ikea must be the sole reason everyone thinks Swedes are pervs :/
einarssone 2 days ago
mtta1979 you must have never seen a couch, because if you did you would know they have these things called crevices all over them where things like forks like to hide and receipts and socks and tons of crap. So your statement is well...generally retarted. Very funny commercials ;)
dustinx45 4 days ago
In the first commercial were the fork goes in the womans back but if you noticed the couch was completly clean nothing was on it not even the fork so just watching that commercial didn't make any sence at all *FAIL*
mtta1979 5 days ago
240p.. We meet again
LawlietJP 5 days ago
looks like the first couple skipped spooning and went straight to forking.
TheMostEpicNameEver 6 days ago 11
I find the last middle one hilarious simply for the fact that she's now on Parenthood.
RCycleRider4Eva 1 week ago
too funny! love it!
jezdamayel 1 week ago
Too bad the vibrator commercial DID reach Dutch television. Because we're cool like that :P
VertigoZero555 1 week ago
@VertigoZero555 we had the last one in england too :p
BrightonPablo 1 week ago
The last one" Behold The 10cm toy bullet!"
Physicspilot 1 week ago 5
Ikea or I kill ya.
250videos 1 week ago 4
The 1st commercial brings a new definition to "do it yourself".
cheesecak152 1 week ago
Just proves what gods ikea are
infinityeelTV 2 weeks ago
Dildo! Lmao
Bigbone92a 2 weeks ago
Where were these aired. Not here in US, we're too conservative for good fun
OuiBlank 3 weeks ago
jajjajaja limpia tu cuarto
CristhianEscurra 3 weeks ago
Haha love the last one xd
TheHallowiebenik 3 weeks ago
Lol hilarious! XD
peaceperson21 3 weeks ago
Haha I love the dildo one LOL :D
11goff 3 weeks ago
1:20 is some funny shit lol
XXkupkakeXXxx 3 weeks ago
they need to put this stuff on tv lol.i would rather watch commercials then these actual commercials that made it on tv xD funny stuff
davidchernikov 3 weeks ago
@CEthomas11 it was a vibrator
laxinFL0R1DA 4 weeks ago
what os that thing the kid was holding?
CEthomas11 4 weeks ago
Hahaha love the last one the kid is so cute
SWAGKINGSson 1 month ago
Lmfao the dildo is funny
moeali777 1 month ago
lol at the kid playing with the dildo
BreadForButter 1 month ago
wow ikea is nasty hahaha
51dumbdumb 1 month ago
This has been flagged as spam show
xChrizmax 1 month ago
lmao the last one was hilarious expessially how the little kid was laughing hahahah! (:
Hailey7713 1 month ago
MOM!!!!!!!!!!
saidivhs 1 month ago
first of all who leeves a fork on a couch second who eats spgetti like that besides your mom third who would want to have secs wit you after you have a kid so just throw that dill away or it time to have that talk to your son.....
singamijig 1 month ago
wtf the third one
rayxbrowning1122 1 month ago
The first one !!!!!!!! LMAO
RoseyLovesBritney1 1 month ago
I bet the last one was awkward for the producers.. "okay... now hand the child the dildo"
jsanford91 1 month ago 115
@jsanford91 ITS A VIBRATOR!!!
Doh616 1 week ago 24
@Doh616 It's a vibrating dildo.
MagePoO 1 week ago
@Doh616 back massager
cza2099 6 days ago
I .love the last one!!!!!! X'D
macko8626 1 month ago
Last one Fail
13XFACEX31 1 month ago
another funny commercial is "slobbersome gum infomercial" its really funny and even has funny bloopers!
randomhahahaa 1 month ago
Oh no! Awe man.. Why would they have a baby play with that..
Vdub15x 1 month ago
why the fuck would ikea, let a child play with a dildo ¿¡ :§
blackninga27 1 month ago
that last commercial was wrong very wrong
foreve331 1 month ago
im at the wird part of youtube again
thegamer13531 1 month ago
Bahahahaa ... Baby playing with a dildo... Can't stop laughing...
johnreyc18 1 month ago
What is so funny about the last one ?
omar52334 1 month ago
OH MY GOD @ last one! That was funny.
peachescrashmacgyver 1 month ago
I'm surprised the second one didn't make the cut. That was fairly clean. The corpse and the vibrator... Not so much.
mistriousfrog 1 month ago
That last one was the best
bubajumo 1 month ago
The last one, Not only for the ladies , Kids can enjoy them too
NB5BHVL 1 month ago
Lmao #SWAG!
DeeJayAyy 1 month ago
wut... hehehehehehe
Kittykatkiddo101 1 month ago
You sure they never made tv? Pretty sure I saw the first and last one before...
08codys90 1 month ago
hahaha. LMFAO
Halo3fanatic1998 1 month ago
LOL
JollyGreenGordon 1 month ago
When that kid grows up, everybody will make fun of him for playing with dildos :P
RainingBrokenHeartz 1 month ago
that's wrong in soo many levels
latinsuga121 1 month ago
ROFL the little kid haha thts great
LazerXX2234 1 month ago
LOL@ THE 3RD ONE!!!
eeagirl128 1 month ago
She got stabbed in the back by a fork.....you know what this mean ladies?
you have angered the the kitchen gods!
mrtundra45 1 month ago
Smh that was not okay get real.
AmbiiEmoRock 1 month ago
Who keeps shoes on their bed while they have dinner? Funny, but it makes no sense
TBIRD0625 1 month ago
OMG!! that is soo funny!! Like kids NEVER find vibrators??
Bjmorgan73 2 months ago
Ok the first two were funny, but the last was...still funny but I wouldn't let my kid even act that part! come on guys get real.
stygianapproach 2 months ago
@stygianapproach
i think the vibro is new, never used. xD
Doze67 2 months ago
@stygianapproach
and the kid have some fun !
Doze67 2 months ago
frgswrgswfrg
Noah414 2 months ago
Nah the first one was how he wants it.
Number1ricky 2 months ago
كيف جت الشوكة ؟
lexus4i 2 months ago
agree only th last one was good, the 1st one na, 2nd one , i saw that coming a mile away..
oakland002 2 months ago
@oakland002 thank you nostradickmus
StupidFatFag 2 months ago
lmfao at 1:27 !!!!
Mr5dollarfootlongs 2 months ago
rofl @ Comercial 3 XD
dreamerz 2 months ago
last one was the best!
24MindyMoo1 2 months ago
lol
tonyandangienc 2 months ago
LOL
athirson101 2 months ago
Check out more funny videos of GOGO - crazy man in a green turtle suit roaming the streets of London and making a lasting impression. Street performance at its best. Must see.
Click my name to witness the awesomeness of the GOGO channel.
AlphaMobileUK 2 months ago
ok what is up with ikea?
Mrcabletwitch 2 months ago
ikea makes really dumb commercials
optimisticgrl 2 months ago
who the fuck lets theyre kid play with a vibrator for a commercial
kennyp521 3 months ago
ladies like em big ladeis like em small, ladies like em all
acookiemonster1 3 months ago
Hahahahaahahhaa
AJUKking 3 months ago
geez the way that kid mad his face in the last oone ude think it was in his but
burtonloco1 3 months ago
well, @ 1st commercial -> She's still warm :P
traicachua96 3 months ago 86
@traicachua96 LOL ur crazy man:))))
EmyY2J 1 month ago
hahahaha last one!!!! that should have made it to tv!
PixieGem247Yo 3 months ago
that was funny
Wisdom162 3 months ago
Aaaaagh lil boy playin w the dildo
GENskateboards 3 months ago
he loves the smell and the way its so slimy
minikeast 3 months ago
Oh....My....Goodness...My jaw dropped at the last one..And i was gagging on the second one..
OfficialBlueOctober 3 months ago
wow, they are so weird. I can see why the last one didnt get on.
Marissaf7 4 months ago
wow, they are so weird. Ican see why the last one didnt get on.
Marissaf7 4 months ago
the last 2 had me rolling
MrJSU2010 4 months ago
did u notice in the first one when they were kissing they were also h**ping O.O
juleahcharisma1 4 months ago
OMG!!! That last one was HILARIOUS!!!
920chrissy 4 months ago
wen da camera went off he boned her unconscious/dead body.
Thebeastwitin1 4 months ago
1:34 skip the ads
ibrahimsub 4 months ago 3
dildo FAIL LOL XD
505pwned 4 months ago
i wonder what that chiled was smelling
505pwned 4 months ago
Oh damn, that wasn't a vibrator, that was mommies special space ship
staightedge801 4 months ago
That kid in the last one is gonna be so screwed when he grows up haha....
TheCatsLastWord 4 months ago
that fork was all like get back to the kitchen bee-yoch!!!
DGMK3672 4 months ago 57
kids dont play with dildos unless its ur girl freinds dildo but make sur she doesnt loloololololololol
MrFunkynutts 4 months ago
the last one made tv ....
hunsaja 4 months ago
poor child
enlargemedia 4 months ago
Lol
xavishep 5 months ago
wooww ..XD
DeathThreatsAndRoses 5 months ago
The Man used 2 FORKs; the one in the FRONT killed her......
prchat 5 months ago
FAIL
greeneyes7377 5 months ago
i wonder how the ppl felt to act that out ... :O
TheAncientSpartan 5 months ago
lol at the last one what a pervert mom
lamascara66 5 months ago
@Inuyasha0261 that's funny, and btw, the last one was just like TOTALLY FUNAY LOL HEHEH! AHAH
ulysses12341 5 months ago
lmao at the last one
KINGVONTAE 5 months ago
Wow. Just wrong! Lmao!
Four2Forty 5 months ago
the ikea one
wat.jpg
SparkSSBM 5 months ago
That last one was so funny. That happend to some girl I know. Her kid found her vibrater and was playing with it.
scloco831 6 months ago
thats not even right .. that shit aint even fuckin funny come on now a fuckin kid playing with a vibrator
e36boyz 6 months ago
OMG!!!!! THE LAST ONE WAS JUST WRONG HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA
ThePureHeartSora 6 months ago 4
the last one is soo wrong xDDD
SpyengoEen 6 months ago
great bud light commercials budlightcommercials(.)net
brandonsince1986 6 months ago
IKEA adverts are jokes
LadyKosmo 6 months ago
lol thats last one !
jcfreakyomii 7 months ago
That last one was uncalled for.
AnimalLover1977 7 months ago
Excellent!
11ryan23 7 months ago
thats not a vibrator, its a Japanese Bullet Train! ^^
pugosisiw 7 months ago
This has been flagged as spam show
tummieloveable 7 months ago
This has been flagged as spam show
scrygor 7 months ago
This has been flagged as spam show
scrygor 7 months ago
lol awkward.
hanniebby 7 months ago
lol ikea
SLYR237 7 months ago
i like the last one
TheALYSSAisawsome 7 months ago
Well I guess that's why these didn't make it to TV XD LMAO at em all buy WAY too inappropriate XDDD lol at the last one xD
JijiGoesRawr 7 months ago
lol
Alefevre101 7 months ago
tehehe!
fresherdanyou5 8 months ago
he started laughing
foxshot97 8 months ago
YOU SICK FILTH IDIOT PRICK
shahidur1992 8 months ago
Last one made ROFL!
SmallLegacy 8 months ago
haha awesome!
youngbostongirl 8 months ago
thats not a vibrator its a new japanese train :P
Inuyasha0261 8 months ago 135
what was he holding?!?!!?
tinkforeverxoxo 9 months ago
WTF IS THAT KID DOING WITH A VIBRATOR IN THE FIRST PLACE SECOND WHO IN THE HELL LEAVES A 70 DOLLAR VIBRATOR OUT IT MUST BE COVERED IN BIO-LUBE
narutosakura144 9 months ago 2
@narutosakura144 woow, you sure know about it..haha
colombiantom 8 months ago
@colombiantom I JUST WATCH TO MUCH MTV AND E
narutosakura144 8 months ago
LAST ONE WAS AWESOME
Hilarygirl93 9 months ago
thta lil boi rotfl
loveable446 9 months ago
stupid
manfam14 9 months ago
wtf all ikea commericals?
SydtheKiddy 9 months ago
ROFL
KevinLuhrs 9 months ago
WTF a dildo for the kid O.o
I'll never buy ikea stuff again !!
liquidus2172 9 months ago
HAHAHAHA
Lobbinit 9 months ago
Funny
dsalmeron 9 months ago
WTF! I've seen all of these on TV in Norway!
MyGuruLife 10 months ago
the last one was awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
sassyfrass1234567890 10 months ago
That last one was awesome, too funny. They had another good vibrator one where the grandmother was using it to stir pancake mix.
samanthasue 10 months ago
thats not right xD
MusicForALifetime123 10 months ago
Ikea was very stupid to think the last one would make TV :P
ShaddsSaidSo 10 months ago
i hope his momma washed that thing lol
Ketterashley82 10 months ago
@Ketterashley82
Especially if it was actually his dad using it. XD
PSReldus 10 months ago
Last one was fkn wrong.
ChaziChaz89 10 months ago 3
the second one was ared
greptor 10 months ago
WTF that last one was a shocker LOL
naru24dude 10 months ago
i like how coincidentally all these are sexual.
MrBluedso 11 months ago
Lauren the kid was playing with a dildo....
acsmith4461 11 months ago
ikea makes some pretty messed up commercials...
myapplesarepurple 11 months ago
didn't understand the last one...
Lauren50381 11 months ago
@Lauren50381 the kid was holding a vibrator...
horsebonanza 10 months ago
@horsebonanza
flashvlad 9 months ago
my favorite was the last one.
McCrystalc123 11 months ago
lmfao wwwwwwoooooowwwwwww
TheM1NN13 11 months ago
laughed so hard i cried lmao!!
jmg102380 1 year ago
LOL made me laugh so hard
XINIX100 1 year ago
Thumbs up if funnyjunk brought you here!
Iownyoujk 1 year ago
It's pretty obvious y these neve made tv
forevertweetie 1 year ago
vibrater classic
MrFichino 1 year ago
If the kid ever realized that he was playing with Mommy's special toy I would suggest telling him it was a misunderstanding as it was actually a model of the Titan Booster used to launch the Gemini manned missions in the 60's preparing NASA for the Apollo Program. I am sure he would buy that explanation.
nolarobert 1 year ago
of i get it he left a fork in the couch, haha thats funny
funfetticupcakes12 1 year ago
funny like - search dem guys
Aldoj77 1 year ago
hole in one shit....
what da f.....
krekkrekmu 1 year ago
Ok So The Kid Playing With The Vibrator Was The Best 1 Hands Down!!lol
ecrump10 1 year ago
Last on lmfao
gogetitbaby1 1 year ago
That was horrible!~
TwinHoN 1 year ago
lmaooo. that's cute (;
bamxtay 1 year ago
oh my lol at the last one
kmk2707 2 years ago 102
the third of the clips (the one with the vibrator) has been shown in swedish television
nissafors 2 years ago
ooooooopppppppppps!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
daniCajoe 2 years ago
no wonder why these videos are so fucking stupid, not even funny... who would give a USED dildo to a kid and let him play with it for a commercial?...
drumerboy223 2 years ago
@drumerboy223 it wasnt used and that was the point of all the commericials 2 tidy up .becuz his mom or whoever was so sloppy kid ends up finding her vibrator n having something he shouldnt.so it tells her 2 "tidy up" and do so by going 2 ikea.
ecrump10 1 year ago
GAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA
dildo + little kid = ?
MacMachineMan 2 years ago 2
Funny kid ! Dildo ? Damn man that's cold.
Put a dong in a kids hands to sell a few fuckin tables , not rite!! €{:(¡) King monkey 3D Dj.
Lvduggo69 2 years ago
Hahaah the kid with the dildoo, funny!!
jackieswirlgirl 2 years ago
oh emm gee . I see why that was banned !! especially the last one aka the funniest !
SenoritaNatalia 2 years ago
one epic fucking kid. :D
Kayatya 2 years ago
Loooooooool! I love the last one.
KaroLovesGames 2 years ago
OMG the last one was HILARIOUS! lololol XD
RikusHeartless 2 years ago 2
omgizzle a vibrator!!
haha holy shiz xD lmao
shiversshivering 2 years ago
ha the kid was playing with a dildo!!!
CrazyChimp 2 years ago 2
hahaha! so funny!!!
Fuzzyllama9 2 years ago
that last vid rockkkkkdd
st3pahniie 2 years ago
LMAO @ LAST VID
K3V1N9993 2 years ago
LMFAO!!!! lat one is hilarious!!!!
xxemoxxanna 2 years ago
the first was kinda stupid but the other to were lol
lazeman95 2 years ago
hahahaha!!! kid playing with vibrator...
Tidy up!
FiveoSmash 2 years ago
rotflmfao hahahahahaah she fucking ate his shoe string lmfao\
this made my fucking day
fatman10103 2 years ago
so funny that kid was playin wit a vibrator i love the way he laughed lol
mileyfan234 2 years ago
lol that kid was playin wit a dildo
Jere2DaMiah 2 years ago
wow HAHAHAHAHAHAHA LMAO
wow lol thats amazing
musicislifez 2 years ago
ROFLMFAO hahahaaa all funny xD
Jeffery0514 2 years ago
LMAO!!!I luv da last 1!
SinThePirateGrl 2 years ago
what was the last 1 about?
angel44444444444 2 years ago
vibrater kid was playing with one
SuperHappyClaw 2 years ago
Rofl Omg This so messed up...
DutsonEntertainment 2 years ago
Lmfao...those are the best IKEA commercials I have ever seen!
DirtyLove87 2 years ago
rofllllll okayy that was funnyyyy. but that kid was too cute, and his laugh and stuff.
SamanthaaMariee9 2 years ago
Comment removed
varro666 2 years ago
omg the kid with the dildo :O lol my jaw dropped...that was nuts
tracyness22 2 years ago
omg! the last one was so nasty how could they think that even funny!!!!!!!!!!!
Beefjerkyy 2 years ago
wow... that was too funny
SaraiVampira 2 years ago
now dis ish isz lyke 2 2 2 2 2 2 funnnneeeee LOL.Zz
Mikejunior252 2 years ago
HAHAHAHAHA i wish television allowed these...
GreatMcGoogler 2 years ago
lmfao rofl... hey Atleast the kid didnt chew on the dildo.
lokibacha 2 years ago
the kid gets all laughy and happy when the vibrator startes up, lmao
MalfoysGirl14 2 years ago 3
shoe string? how could that happen i mean who keeps shoes where they gonna eat
URSOGAY2008 2 years ago 3
lmao I was just about to comment that.
Retribution077 2 years ago
I didn`t get the last one
clonecody2 2 years ago
what didnt you get????
MalfoysGirl14 2 years ago
The boy was playing with a dildo.
Retribution077 2 years ago
it was a dildo
1foldedcrazyfrog1 2 years ago
rofl the dildo!!!!!!!
Gears2JunkieOfWar 2 years ago
hahaha the dildo
overkill7000 2 years ago 3
lmao, the kid with the dildo! lol
2412jojo 2 years ago
when that kid looks back on that day when he is old enough to understand what we held he is going to go through a lot of counciling lol.
DevilChildDante 2 years ago 55
i read ur comment and i was laughing so hard i was crying witch i have never done.
peytonredrocks 2 years ago
lmfao the vibrator start to vibrate and he was all excited
3DGFORLYFE 2 years ago
wow..the second was sooo creepy..
ambyrae 2 years ago
1:21 lol
fartsandeggsxx 2 years ago
lololo vibrator lol
Rockyhorrorfan5 2 years ago
OMG LOL
Mikejunior252 2 years ago
the last was the funniest lol
tylerdork1 2 years ago
omfg the vibrator was hysterical!!
luvbutton78 2 years ago
haha omg the vibrator haha that poor kid
ThnksfrthMmrs1114 2 years ago
oh shit that vibrator was funny as hell omg i shit myself!!!!
brownie21566 2 years ago
the kid with the vibrater stole the show, omg i almost pissed laughing LMAO
XxPunkRockChikaxX 2 years ago 2
ohmygawd!!! i love the last one!!
sarahgboo 2 years ago
HAHAH THE DILDO!
VampirexVickii 2 years ago
haha funny
fredbirdusa 2 years ago
LOL.
maskofmemories 2 years ago
lmao the last one was the funniest
haynwarrior5 2 years ago 2
HAHA the shoelace one xD
puddlesofdoom 2 years ago
lol, all of these did make it onto TV in california!
EgotisticPain 2 years ago
LOL DILDO
lolisjason 2 years ago
This has been flagged as spam show
Rommette 2 years ago
Lmfao! at the last one. oH my god.
Favorited
IHaveAMask 2 years ago 2
man it passive
nikkj2 2 years ago
holy shit!!! I get it violence against Women.
e22378 2 years ago
Hmmm- I hadn't thought about it that way - maybe I should put a warning on it.
skydiverjim 2 years ago
@e22378 Ofc its violence against women
deadforsakenn 1 year ago
@e22378 good eye dude, i just noticed it.
greenchavez13 1 year ago
Jan 5, 2012
Old hunter's checkup
An 86-year-old man went to his doctor for his annual check-up...
The doctor asked him how he was feeling, and the 86-year-old said, "Things are great and I've never felt better. I now have a 20-year-old bride who is pregnant with my child! So what do you think about that Doc?"
The doctor considered his question for a minute and then began to tell a story. "I have an older friend, much like you, who is an avid hunter and never misses a season."
"One day he was setting off to go hunting. In a bit of a hurry, he accidentally picked up his walking cane instead of his gun.... As he neared the lake, he came across a very large male beaver sitting at the water's edge."
"He realized he'd left his gun at home and so he couldn't shoot the magnificent creature. Out of habit he raised his cane, aimed it at the animal as if it were his favorite hunting rifle, and went 'bang, bang'....
Miraculously, two shots rang out and the beaver fell over dead.
Now, what do you think of that?" asked the doctor.
The 86-year-old said, "Logic would strongly suggest that somebody else pumped a
couple of rounds into that beaver."
The doctor replied, "My point exactly."
The doctor asked him how he was feeling, and the 86-year-old said, "Things are great and I've never felt better. I now have a 20-year-old bride who is pregnant with my child! So what do you think about that Doc?"
The doctor considered his question for a minute and then began to tell a story. "I have an older friend, much like you, who is an avid hunter and never misses a season."
"One day he was setting off to go hunting. In a bit of a hurry, he accidentally picked up his walking cane instead of his gun.... As he neared the lake, he came across a very large male beaver sitting at the water's edge."
"He realized he'd left his gun at home and so he couldn't shoot the magnificent creature. Out of habit he raised his cane, aimed it at the animal as if it were his favorite hunting rifle, and went 'bang, bang'....
Miraculously, two shots rang out and the beaver fell over dead.
Now, what do you think of that?" asked the doctor.
The 86-year-old said, "Logic would strongly suggest that somebody else pumped a
couple of rounds into that beaver."
The doctor replied, "My point exactly."
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